Dr. Cale’s Blog

Are You Really Ready To Help Your Kids Have Fun?  It’s time for summer fun…and we are all outside a bit more, going places with the family more, and ultimately…having more time with the kids. Many of us make a critical mistake however…as we begin to plan the summer.I am often working with parents who are struggling with their child’s behavior…and many at-home parents find that things really get worse with the kids home all the time. These same parents get frustrated with how hard they work to create summertime fun, while their kids whine, complain, and even tantrum through days of endless summer fun.

Today, I am going to talk about the “Readiness Test” to have fun. In a day or so…I will be back to talk abut the 3 strike rule, and how it helps!

Take the Readiness To Have Fun Test!
Here’s a good summertime test to find out how enjoyable your summer will be.

1. Just ask yourself this: “How often does it feel like I am working harder at my children’s enjoyment than they are?”

Pause for a moment: Just consider this carefully…”Who is working harder at their fun?” It’s a feeling thing. You notice your gut. When they are struggling…do you keep trying to make things better? If so, then you are likely finding…it doesn’t work! (Why this is so…we will discuss at another time…but just watch their behavior. If you are working harder than they are…then they become DEPENDENT upon you, more and more, to have moments of just everyday happiness!) If you find that it often feels that you are the one working harder than they are to enjoy family outings, then you may want to seek a change. This concept becomes very important to a more peaceful, enjoyable summer.

2. Next question: “How often do child behaviors (e.g., whining, crying, tantrums, complaints, upsets, etc.) get in the way of a enjoying a family outing, or an enjoyable day at home?”

Here again…pause. Notice how much you have to step in to fix things. If minimal…great! If not so minimal, then you see that this starts to steal your happiness…and their happiness…from your summer.

3. How often do you avoid outings, get togethers, or travel…because you feel uncertain about handling the kid’s behavior.If you find yourself here, then things are pretty serious. We can’t end up dancing around child behavior upsets. If you do, then those upsets “own” the direction of you and your family. Big problem…and a huge thief has stolen your summer joy.

Monday, I will talk about what you can begin to do about this…as perhaps a change is needed. I will ask you to consider the Dr. Cale’s Three Strike Rule. (Come back tomorrow to learn how this can make behavior management much easier this summer!) Get a head start here!

Randy L Cale, PhD

 

Tag:fun problems with summer public behavior summer summer summer behavior problems summer fun